im so fucking worried about rin. 


Haru says that he swims for his friends, and rin consider that includes himself.  He wants haru to go to nationals, possibly international, with him. i think rin doesnt want to reach his dreams alone anymore. he wants his friends to join him, thats why he was thrilled that sousuke’s school scouted him too. 

and Rin said that haru saved him. Haru and the others. rin wants to swim with his friends, be in the relay with his friends, because he feel free when he swims/race with his friends.

i think thats why he keep on asking if haru had made up his mind yet. Rin still wants to race haru even after high school.

and this face broke me into pieces


its the same expression haruka wore when rin said he quit swimming, when they were younger.  Rin probably felt guilty for thinking of being too pushy to haru and made haru said that he dont have a future.

rin probably feels like haru will stop swimming/racing with him any longer.that haru will stop being his friend.

i think thats why his eyes looked like crushed hopes ._.


but thats just my random sad depressing thoughts.